Breathe in, breathe out.  sip some more iced coffee.  Yes I am doing okay.  Boy everyone on my FB is so worried.  I love you guys!  .    Yes I really am okay,.  Not in the best of shape and I was scared earlier.  I really do appreciate all of your concern and yes I am okay.  I now appreciate those with MS a bit more, I understand that lack of vision and I think that is the scariest part.  If my vision were better I wouldn't be so afraid to drive but with it as bad as it is I don't dare get behind the wheel of a car right now.especially with it getting dark.

I'm feeling kind of "asthmatic" right now.  glad I was able to find my in haler because I ran out of the nebulizer medication and can't get it until I get the blood work done, can't get my thyroid medication until the blood work comes back.  Again I'm not going all the way to Wilkes Barre for the Endo, there is one up here in Scranton that is taking new patients so I'm going to see if I can get in there.  But I was able to "fuel" up enough today to feel okay.  and yes mom if I felt worse I would have called the ambulance to take me to the ER but I started feeling better.  I'm drinking iced coffee right now so I should be okay for the most part.  To keep track I'm setting my clock for tow hour naps.

I also want to get some fresh veggies would be nice, cucumber and tuna fish sandwiches would be nice.  Some pasta with dressing and green veggies, yeah that sounds good.   Maybe later, I'm going to kick up my feet right now and doze a bit with my Sophie, She has a full tummy for sure, was very pleased with her dinner tonight with the "drizzle" of bacon juice over her food this evening.

All of that will come in time, after my thyroid gets back to normal.  or what my normal is.  for now, a snooze.  This pretty much says it all...Waning moon phase moon is getting smaller
. 

---Had a fairly decent nap.  Just woke up.  Needed that nap before I killed Sophie.  She's been getting her little self into a lot of trouble lately and getting on my last nerve.  She almost made it today with her little tricks;  I have been on and off flaring lately and my health hasn't been all that great because of it.  I am in need of blood wok on top o f it so I'm not in all that great of shape but I'm moving on as they say. 

Sophie has been a bit of a trouble maker getting into things and had gotten herself into minor scrapes like getting stuck outside under the car where I've had to go out and get her and it all culminated into me having to pull the dryer out fro the wall today so I could get her out from behind! 

Last week she got on my desk and knocked down the bowl of treats I have up here for when she does her business outside and comes in.  She enjoys them so they are "special" for when she does it all outside (Occasionally I will find poop on the bathroom floor, can't really say to much because it is the Bathroom floor only you know).  Not only did she knock this bowl down but she managed to get the lid off and eat all of the treats therefore emptying the dish before it's time and having to wait until I make another  dog food run next week. 

So she has been in search of anything that may have fallen on the floor while I have been fixing my meals and has chased some to under the stove fridge and of course washer and dryer.  Until today where she ran up and chased possibly a moue with a morsel behind the the dryer and got her little bootee stuck.  I was in there fixing myself a big "gulp" of water and heard her little whine had to go in and grab a tank pf O2 and boost it way up and set with it getting as much as I could so I could go in there and move the damn machine! 

And the doctor's office won't send someone out to help me with my car when I need to get bloodworm done.  Can you figure out why I would want to change primary providers?  Well I'm hungry right now, Sophie is too so I'm going to go get us some food and turn on some Judge Judy, want to join us?

Sophie Stay stay the hell out of trouble!!!

Sitting here waiting for coffee to brew, thinking about age.  After-all I'm going to be 60 next October.  Who thought I would make it this far huh?  Anyway I was thinking about what we are called as we age.  In our younger years we are newborns, infants, babies, children, kids, preteens, teens, young adults, young folks, then sir and ma'am as we move into our late 40s.  I was actually called "Ma'am" when I was in my 20s but that was because I was because I was on a Military establishment and was asking a question of a young cadet and that is part of the training there, to teach them discipline and respect even though it made me feel old and gray LOL. 

So there I was in my late 40s moving into my fifties accepting being called a "ma'am"   The older I got the less it bothered me.  I even chuckled at younger women would complain about being called "Ma'am" I would think to myself :just wait, someday it won't phase you".

Well the other day I got a new revaluation.  Here I am nearing 60 and it has happened more than once but now I'm being called "dear" I was at the store the other day,m reaching for something when a much younger woman came up behind, "Here let me get you that dear" she said.  Then a few days after that one of the store clerks said "How are you feeling dear?"  Yes it is official I am now no longer Miss, Ms, Ma'am I am now "Dear".  Yes I will accept this one too because with this one comes the fact that I don't have to explain any of it anymore.  If I get into trouble "Oh that's okay dear we will just clean it all up"   As I am being redirected with that maniacal look on my face, giggling in side like a schoolgirl!--

So I have spent this afternoon connecting with my family.  Called and spoke with My cousins Nick and Carol.  It was so good hearing their voices.  Sorry Nick if my call interrupted a meeting but Hell doesn't freeze over that much LOL

Actually I had been on my way to get blood work done but with that much ice on my windshield and me with the O2 tanks I just can't do it.  So I'm searching for a new Primary Provider here in town who can possibly send someone out to take it like a  home health aid, because my current primary isn't up to the task. 

Yes I should have had the blood work done prior to winter however I didn't have the money and with no insurance I couldn't pay for it before now.  Now that I can pay for it I can't get to where to go to have it done and no one is willing to help.  So I will have to find a new provider.

So I came in and called my cousins, gave my cousin Carol a jolt because she says I sound like my mother.  My mother passed about four years ago?  But it's all water under the bridge.  Life is what it is.  Now to contact the new provider and see if I can book myself in. 

Well with Christmas over time to update the look and "feel" of the place.  I needed some new music but there for awhile couldn't remember how to edit it back into the template.  Oh the misfortunes of the "lupus fog" .  I couldn't even remember where to search to get the information!  I was making myself crazy over it.  Finally gave it up, let what is left up there inside my head have a day or two and guess what?  I marinated on it awhile and Bazinga there it was all the time at my fingertips.  Now who would have thunk it?

For New Years I felt Mimosas at breakfast would be festive, don't you?  Although this time of year they might be a bit chilly for here in the North East.  Do you like the music?  It is the song from Les Miserable s that caused Susan Boyle to make Simon stand up and take notice..  She still has a great voice.  I have it up to as a "nod" toward my favorite child...Shannon.  She used to sing this one quite nicely herself. 


Yes the weather, lots of ice and snow.  I was going to go out for some blood work today but when I saw that Susan upstairs had decided to say home rather than go in to work because of the roads I decided to drop the blood work back yet another day.  I know I have to get to it so I can continue on with my medications but it takes so long to prepare and being only one person it takes over an hour to do so.  That's not counting the pain and how at the end of it all I am exhausted.  I get tired just having to think about it.  So I curl up in my chair with Sophie next to me and we snuggle and watch television. 


Flaring most of last week didn't help either.  I can't do much when that happens.  I almost passed out a couple of times just walking from the kitchen back to my desk chair.  Some days it just is not worth it to get out of bed;.  I know that I'm going to be flaring more and more as winter works it's way through.  It is cold and damp and I have such a hard time with that kind of weather.  Cold and dry is okay, yes I feel the pain but I can get warm.  Cold and damp the dampness never leaves and I always feel the cold bite in mints and in my bones.  It is hard to stand when the hips are "screaming.